Her Majesty’s Mysterious Giveaway!
Are you a Steampunk Fanatic?
Want to enter for a chance to win one of three eCopies of Her Majesty’s Mysterious Conveyance?
HA! Do Airships Float? OF course you do!!!!!
“So how does one enter,” you ask? Tis simple. Even a grease monkey could accomplish it!
I shall even give you options!
You can:
I just entered to win Her Majesty’s Mysterious Conveyance from @shaydenfl ‘s blog! #steampunk http://wp.me/pVp6Y-a0
Tweet this message to your followers!
OR!
Yes, I did make it that simple!
Once you’ve done EITHER (or both if you’re feeling gracious) simply leave a comment that, “HEY! I FREAKING ENTERED!” and please leave your name!
That’s it. 3 winners will be chosen randomly by putting their names on tiny pieces of paper and pulled randomly out of a hat. I will video the whole process to keep it fair!
GOOD LUCK!
Contest ends FEB 1st, 2012. Winners will be announced in that day’s blog post.
I Haz New Releaz :D
It’s that time of year again people! Have a whole plethora of shtuffs comin your way.
Deceptions, the sequel to Origins is coming out VERY soon. I should have a release date any day now. As soon as i DO, I will let you know.
The short story series, The Magnificent Steam Carnival of Professor Pelusian Minus episode 4 that Connor, my twelve year old son and I are writing together should be out soon, too! Will keep you posted on that as well.
BUT…
IN the meantime…
A while back I was asked to do a Steampunk Anthology with some TRULY talented authors. Nick and Elizabeth Valentino and Jennifer Williams. I was soooo excited to do this anthology. We all had to follow the theme pick a foreign country as our setting. I’m mostly Irish, so I picked Croatia. Just kidding. I picked Ireland and my story follows the journey of a young Traveler (or Tinker as they are often called) on her journey to become Queen. I hope you enjoy it!
Product Description
**Ten Thousand Years
Pirate captain Maro and his crew have embarked on their most dangerous mission. To secure the release of his former army platoon wrongly imprisoned in Korea, Maro has snared the Empress of Japan’s private airship in an attempt to kidnap her for ransom. Before they reach her, they must daringly board the Empress’ ship, blast their way through samurai automatons, and escape the powerful and menacing Japanese military airship, the Great Phoenix. Through determination and bloodshed, Maro and his men fight to regain their honor, but the real meaning of sacrifice is miraculously realized by the most unlikely one of them all.
**Queen of the Travelers
Their people have had many names over the years: tinkers, tynkers, gypsies, an Lucht Siúil, and other less savory names. They are the Travelers. Shannon is happy with her clan. They make their living scrounging the scrap yards of Ireland, foraging to keep their crawlers working. Even among the mechanically inclined, Shannon is extraordinarily blessed, but her abilities may become a curse. The Queen of the Travelers is passing and Shannon is ripped from her clan as a candidate for the throne…if she can survive.
**Reclaiming the Throne
Sophia has one immediate goal: eliminate a threat to the throne. As a young vampire assassin, she’s spent her entire life taking orders and fighting in the name of the Royal Paranormal Supremacy society. But now they’ve turned on her. As she prowls the icy Serbian mountains, she faces off against another vampire with a mission of his own, but he doesn’t play by the government’s rules. Together, they must lay their lives and their hearts on the line to do what is right and help the rightful Serbian heir, reclaim the throne. It will take all their skills and mechanical wonders to make it out alive.
**The Hidden History of Stones: Or How the Sinking Jenny Was Sunk
Victoria’s England, Victoria’s London. It is a time of great change for the Capital. A time of industry and enterprise, sweat and smoke. But even as this century rushes to catch up with its own progress, a greater change is coming. Deep within the River Thames, something that has been asleep for hundreds of years is stirring. For the crew of the Sinking Jenny it is just another piece of salvage dredged up from the ancient mud, and not even a particularly valuable one at that, but the Stone holds the knowledge of Kings and Queens, the secrets of every man and woman, and the lies that all children keep in their hearts. For Captain Hardy, the mysterious Mr Rymer and their young apprentice Bill, the Stone is the beginning of a nightmare.
Book Review: Zombies Don’t Cry by Rusty Fischer
DESCRIPTION:
Genre: Kick ass YA Zombie Story
Price: Too low
Pages: Not enough
Rating: 5 zombie thumbs
Okay, I normally don’t review books especially on my blog. If I read a book and its really good I post a review on amazon. The fact that I’m actually reviewing this book should speak VOLUMES (get it? Made a book joke.) about Zombies Don’t Cry.
I’ll admit it. I’m a vampire nut. I read about them, write about them, and occasionally dream about them. I have never felt anything other than icky about zombies. Don’t like zombie movies. Don’t like zombie books. Don’t like zombie merchandising or action figures. I always thought they were pretty gross and as for fictional characters left little for character development when their only dialogue is, “Brains!”
I hate zombies sooo much, that if the zombie apocalypse ever came to be, hand me a shotgun and a chainsaw and get behind me. I’ll lead the way to safety!
Then I fell in love. Not with a zombie, but a zombie book. I had the opportunity to meet Rusty Fischer at the Spooky Empire Convention in Orlando. What an amazing guy. Personable and just a lot of fun. He gave me a copy of his book and said, “Here. TRY it.” So I did. Thanks be to the gods for Rusty Fischer. He had me hooked from chapter one. He actually makes being a zombie, COOL!
If you’ve ever seen a zombie movie, you know the premise for every zombie book ever written. You know “Tanker truck crashes spilling toxic waste in the mostly deserted town. Redneck comes into contact with said toxic waste, becomes zombie, bites everybody, and by the end the last two survivors of humanity are surrounded by the zombie hordes in a desert somewhere.” That story.
Zombie’s Don’t Cry is NOTHING like that. Rusty pens a tale of wit, humor, edge of your seat excitement and makes you root for the undead! They’re the good guys and I can promise you there isn’t one poorly sealed container of toxic waste anywhere in the story! WOOT WOOT!
So grab your kindle, and throw this one on it. I promise you that you won’t be disappointed especially if you’re into YA Books. It’s a great story from start to finish, doesn’t leave you with a cliffhanger, and has plenty of room to grow for sequential works! (If you read this, I’m serious, Rusty. I want them to go to Disney World next!)
Biography:
A former high school teacher, Rusty Fischer is the author of several supernatural novels for young adults, including Zombies Don’t Cry, Vamplayers and Afterlife Academy. He and his beautiful wife Martha live in sunny Cape Canaveral, Florida.
Visit: www.zombiesdontblog.blogspot.com.
And the Nominees Are… ME! :D
I gotta tell you, few things in this world PISS me off as much as waking up in the morning. My arch nemesis is that stupid little alarm clock application on my iPhone. People who wake up bright eyed and bushy tailed should be shot. In the kneecap. Dragged over a grated drawbridge by a formula-one race car, soaked in alcohol, beaten up, and then shot again. If after all that and they are still breathing, kick the crap out of them again.
So, this morning started out like any other normal Thursday morning. Alarm went off. I cracked my eyelids, moaned, let out a string of scathing expletives that would make a nun blush, and crawled out of bed like a hungover gutter rat. Which is weird, since I don’t drink.
Now we hit the remainder of my morning routine. I crawl through the house and pay homage to the gods of the arabica bean (turn on the Keurig) and hit the bathroom after that (have to do something for a minute while the coffee brews).
I won’t bore you (or scar you) with my morning bathroom ritual. Let’s just say, some people read. I turn on my iPhone, check book sales, check twitter, check facebook, and lastly…go through the gumpteenmillion emails I seem to get when I’m sleeping. Well. LO AND BEFRIGGING HOLD…I got an email that made me not only smile, but jump up and down for joy! (Which I don’t recommend until AFTER the completion of the morning ritual)
I received an email from the great folks at the Paranormal Romance Guild. They reviewed my book Origins a few months back and I actually blushed from their review. Well needless to say, when I read their email that said they were nominating it for the Best Read of 2011, I almost fainted!
SO now that it’s nominated, I NEED YOUR HELP!
“How?” you ask…
Simple! GO VOTE FOR ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Please and thank you very much with sugar and chocolatesauce on top!
Here’s the email! and the links n’ stuffs:
YOUR BOOK HAS BEEN CHOSEN BEST READ OF 2011
Happy New Year Dear Authors,The Paranormal Romance Guild is happy to announce your Book has been chosen
as the Best Read in 2011 by our reviewers and we are having a contest for
readers to choose the winner….Attached is a jpg so you can promote this
with your book to your sites and have your fans come bring out the vote for
your book…Voting will be on our site www.paranormalromanceguild.com
The contest will begin and go live on the 6th of January and end midnight
the 20th of January. We will open site today for you to view but the voting
link will not open until 9 am the 6th of January EST. voting site is
prg.contest@gmail.com
Method Writing and Crazy Novelists – Guest Post by Devin O’Branagan
In twenty years of being a professional author I’ve had a lot of strange adventures and created a bunch of crazy characters. The riskiest part of what I do as a novelist is to practice “method writing.” As in “method acting,” I “become” my characters so they come across as realistic. No wonder I am a neurotic mess.
I’ve been the Antichrist, a female version of the second coming of Christ, witches, demons, angels, vampires, drag queens, Cher impersonators, tin-foil-hat-wearing conspiracy theorists, and dogs…a whole hell of a lot of dogs. Oddly, I do dogs best. Go figure.
In my most recent paranormal thriller, THRESHOLD, I was a tween boy who drowns, has a near-death experience, and returns with a mission. First off, I must mention boys that age sure think about sex a lot, don’t they? It was hard to get past all Cole’s lustful yearning to stay on track and save the world. Besides Cole’s compulsive desire for a hot sixteen-year-old redhead named April, he’s also a die-hard Trekkie. So, of course he sees the after-death tunnel of light as a wormhole, and the divine guide on the other side as the omnipotent Q from the Star Trek franchise. He ponders profound Star Trek episodes in order to work out metaphysical dilemmas. (Thank goodness I had a ten-year-old Trekker on Twitter to consult with about such divine matters.) And Cole sits at the bar of the Desperado Saloon waxing philosophic by the hour, pausing every once in a while to tell the barkeep to, “Hit me again.” Bartender Saul stifles his amusement as he tops off Cole’s frosty mug of root beer.
I really enjoyed being Cole, especially since he ends up being the most heroic character I ever created. My own earliest fantasies involved saving the world and because of my writing I’ve been a superhero more times than I could have ever imagined. I love my job.
However, I also love being a dog. I really, really do. Perhaps this is something I should discuss in detail with the veterinarian, um, psychiatrist on my next visit.
* * *
Read the first chapter of THRESHOLD here: http://www.devinwrites.com/bookexcerpts/thresholdchapterone.html
* * *
THRESHOLD is available in both print and as an eBook. Find links to where it may be purchased here: http://www.devinwrites.com/threshold.html
* * *
Devin O’Branagan writes paranormal thrillers, urban fantasy, paranormal chick lit, comic chick lit, and canine chick lit. Her bestselling urban fantasy, GLORY, was nominated for the 2011 Best Popular Paperback for Young Adults List, sponsored by the Young Adult Library Services Association (YALSA) of the American Library Association. She writes a humor column for TAILS Magazine, is a member of the Dog Writers Association of America, and uses her writing projects to support animal rescue. Her publishers have included Simon & Schuster’s Pocket Books, Germany’s Heyne Verlag, and Turkish publisher Dogan Egmont. To learn more about her novels, find out about her latest book giveaway, and join her popular writers’ forum, visit her website at www.DevinWrites.com
A Very Scary Christmas
GREETINGS AND SALUTATIONS DENIZENS OF EARTH!
I don’t know if I told all of you my superexciting news, but I figured now would be a great time to share it. A few months ago I was contacted by the writing group and I was invited to join The Scriborium. They are just starting out but run by a fantastic Author, Kyra Dawson. Needless to say I jumped right on board and within a month I received an invitation that really, really made me smile.
Working closely with Foden Press, The Scriborium decided to put out an anthology for Christmas. Now when everyone thinks of Christmas, they think mistletoe, hot cocoa, and Santa. The Scriborium wanted to do something a little different. Thus was born AVery Scary Christmas. It’s an anthology with a Christmas Theme alright, but with just a dash of HORROR! I couldn’t have been happier that they asked me to partake in the anthology.
I had five million other projects in the works, but I knew I wanted to be a part of it. I have this quirk. Most of the time I just sit down and write a story from start to finish, but when asked to write something specific I have a bad habit of coming up with a title and then writing the story around it. I immediately started working on clever puns for my title. I figured the easiest way would be to substitute slay for sleigh. Yeah. Pretty clever huh? I thought so. My other problem is I like to maintain a modicum of originality. Usually when I come up with a clever title I check Amazon to see if it’s ever been used before. I hit the proverbial wall. Check Amazon. Care to take a guess as to how many Christmas themed stories have the word “SLAY” in it. Yeah. I didn’t either. I decided to take my puns elsewhere.
But then I had a bit of inspiration. I’ve always been a fan of every spin on A Christmas Carol you could imagine. To date my favorite is Bill Murry in Scrooged. I FRIGGING LOVED that movie. Then the wheels of the noggin bus went round and round. What if I Horrified my own Scrooge story? HELL YEAH! That only left a catchy title to come up with…
Thus was born The Ghost of Christmas Last.
I didn’t even have to think of it. It just came to be.
Smiling to myself, I put the project on the back burner and worked on the multitude of other things I had going on until the day before the deadline…
Okay, lol. You might not know this about me, but remember that stupid story about the grasshoppers gathering food for the winter? One worked hard all year, the other waited til the last minute? Yep. You guessed it. I’m the stupid grasshopper.
Panicking I did the only thing I could think of. I brewed a pot of coffee, grabbed my laptop, locked my bedroom door, and sat down to write.
I got up only to eat and use the bathroom.
I pumped out 10,000 words and I will say, never before had a story flowed from my fingers more fluidly or faster. It was almost as if the story wrote itself. I had FUN with it. I made the ghost scary as hell and tried my best to make the story touching like its predecessors. Usually when I complete a story I’m so worried that everyone will hate it that I feel a little sick inside. This time, I didn’t care. I smiled when i typed the end. I loved it when I went over it. I wrote the Christmas story I had always wanted to write and I was damn proud. Until I submitted it. Then the stomach flops and butterflies started. LOL. I’m such a dork.
Anyway, I hope you truly love not only my story, but the whole anthology. A bunch of us poured our hearts and souls into it! MUHAHAHAHA.
Be sure to check it out, the wonder folks at Foden Press, and The Scriborium!
Here’s a ton of links for your Perusal!
Here’s the first blog POST about A Very Scary Christmas
Be sure to Check us out on FACEBOOK
And heres some links for Foden Press! Be sure to check out all their books!
My wacky interview with Jen Wylie
Okay, a few weeks ago, Jen Wylie interviewed me. It was unlike any interview I had ever done before. The questions weren’t stuffy, they were fun. They were silly. I had a BLAST. I asked her if I could reciprocate…She said YES. BWAHAHAHAHA. Here’s how little miss sunshine answered!
Without thinking about it type the first word that pops in your head. Good, now tell us why you thought of that!
Butt. Because I have a “Butt in Gear!” sign right above my laptop to motivate me.
If Zeus came down from Olympus high and offered you godhood, what would your name and dominion be? (ie Chocosophecles, God of Cocoa Beans)
You mean goddesshood right? Just checking. I’m sure that was a simple mistake. Hmm… I was going to say some name, Goddess of rainbows..but apparently there already is one (Iris). Maybe I can take her out and steal her spot… I do so like tossing rainbows around. Since I do love sunbeams too… lets go with Radia
Have you ever looked at a fish tank, spotted an exotic fish and thought, “Gee, I bet he would be tasty with lemon butter…”
Um…no? I can’t eat butter. I’m intolerant to all dairy products (which SUCKS by the way)
If you were forced to eat an endangered animal, what would it be and why?
You ask strange questions. Just saying. I think I’d stick to fruit and veggies.
How do you tell an aquatic mammal from a fish?
You ask it.
Mammals breath air.
If you could paint a zebra one color, what would it be? (Please pick one, zebras give me a headache when i stare too long)
Black.
When you were in school, did you ever steal anyone’s lunch? Cheat on a test? Wipe a booger under your desk?
I didn’t eat a lot in school. Sometimes in math I’d write forumlas on my calculator in pencil. Is that cheating? Really, in real life you’d have the stupid things handy. Boogers no, gum occasionally.
What is your favorite flavor of pencil, #2 or colored?
Coloured of course.
My favourite are the rainbow hued ones, where you turn it and get a different colour. See how I keep spelling colour (and favourite)? It’s so refreshing. Am I driving you nuts yet? Colour colour colour colour…
If you could be any animal on the planet, what would it be?
A dolphin. Dolphins are awesome.
After a grueling day plowing the fields, have you ever peeled off your stinky socks and just couldn’t resist taking a whiff to see how hard you were working?
Never. Ever. Is that a guy thing???
Name your favorite cartoon. Be warned if you say Spongebob you will be jolted by 20000 volts of electricity to cure you of your addiction.
OMG I sooo can’t stand Spongebob. I hate when my kids used to watch it, luckily not so much anymore. Actually, their current favourite station has been running ‘oldies’, like the Smurfs! Smurfs rock!
If you were a flavor of icecream what would it be. BESIDES CHOCOLATE.
What do you mean, Besides chocolate? Seriously? I guess tiger tail then.
and now I shall wonder how many people will google to see what that is…
What’s your favorite flavor of Jelly Belly Jelly Beans? (If you don’t know what they are, you must type, “I am not from this planet” as your response.
We DO have those in Canada too you know! I like the fruity ones. Except that one sour green one…
Do you giggle when you see the title “Moby Dick”? Why?
No…. but now you’ve thrown my mind in the gutter and I’m blushing.
How many seconds is your cutoff point before you pick something up off the floor and eat it? Don’t say 5. Everyone knows that rule, I’m trying to determine if you’re a rebel.
That depends. Is it bacon or chocolate? If not, I throw it in the garbage. Otherwise it depends on how clean the floor is (we have a lot of pets- dog hair everywhere… so this is an important factor.)
Oday ouyay eakspay igpay atinlay?
Like a few languages, I understand it better than I can speak it. (French and German)
Have you ever had hossenfeffer. Do you know what hossenfeffer is? Then how do you know if you’ve had it?
0_o Ya, I don’t know what that is. Next question.
If you were magically given a third eye, would you run right out and buy a pair of trinoculars or would you just make do with the binoculars you have?
Why would be given a third eye? You mean a magical one? Aren’t they invisible? If I had 3 working real eyes, wouldn’t I see better? If not, I’m sure my new vision would short circuit my brain anyways.
Little Jamie stole your FAVORITE red crayon in second grade. If you had an egg in your hand and could pelt Little Jamie in the head without EVER getting caught, would you?
My little sister’s name is Jaime. She stole lots of my things. I never hit her with an egg…oh wait. Maybe I did… I hope she forgot about that… I’m pretty sure I DID get caught though.
Who’s the mostest bestest perfectest awesomest interview question maker upper you ever had send you 20 questions to answer, got them, said HOLY CRAP, and then realized in your head that that person was the mostest bestest perfectest awesomest interview question maker upper ever. (Hint: the answer is me
)
I didn’t need a hint, silly. The answer is you of course. Now give me a cookie. Please. With rainbows and sunbeams.
CRAZY interview with author Chris Redding
1. Okay, probably the most important question of the entire interview. Spaghettios WITH or WITHOUT meatballs?
You just can’t hide from the past…
Mallory Sage lives in a small, idyllic town where nothing ever happens. Just the kind of life she has always wanted. No one, not even her fellow volunteer firefighters, knows about her past life as an agent for Homeland Security.
Former partner and lover, Trey McCrane, comes back into Mallory’s life. He believes they made a great team once, and that they can do so again. Besides, they don’t have much choice. Paul Stanley, a twisted killer and their old nemesis, is back.
Framed for a bombing and drawn together by necessity, Mallory and Trey go on the run and must learn to trust each other again―if they hope to survive. But Mallory has been hiding another secret, one that could destroy their relationship. And time is running out.
Want a signed copy of Origins?
Howdy, folks!
Just wanted to give y’all a heads up. See, I loves me some Halloween. The whole damn thing. From ghosts to goblins, witches to warlocks. I love decorations. I love orange punch served in hollowed out skulls. But most of all…I FRIGGIN LOVE FUN SIZED SNICKERS BARS!
Oh, and I love scary books.
And I love giving people things.
So…I decided to throw all this shit in one big spooky cauldron, give it a couple of twirls…and poof!
I decided to give away one signed copy of Origins away to one lucky prize winner. Now I don’t know if any of you are familiar with the site, Goodreads, but them’s some exceptional folk over there. They truly bring the reader and the writer together in a way that’s not only socially acceptable, but legal in 49 of these here states.
The REALLY cool part of Goodreads is they haz these giveawaythingymabobbers. Basically I put in my ISBN, they post the give away, all these people sign up, they pick the winner, and I ship out the book. How cool is that. I just put the give away up this morning and already 133 people have entered to win. Perdy cool huh?
The only problem is I love the people who read my blog. I’ve shared more on here than I have with my last twelve therapists. (Good news! Six of them should be getting out of rehab shortly. I talked to some of them the other day and none of them blame me for their condition…much.) So. I guess I just wanted to say, get your butts on over to good reads and sign up to win!
Thank you. You may now resume your normal lives.
P.S. If I come by your house for tricks or treats, YOU BETTER HAVE SOME FUCKING FUN SIZE SNICKERS!!!! I get one piece of laffy taffy or a pixie stick and your ass is grass. Just sayin.
CLICK HERE TO ENTER!
Origins
141 people requested it
status: approved
ends: October 31, 2011 12:00AM
















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