Nothing


It’s too damn easy to write a blog about anything. There’s just way too many possibilities. No challenge. It’s like swatting a fly with a buick. It’s like teasing Obama about the recession. It’s like making fun of George Bush. It’s like teasing Martha Stewart about her bitchy attitude. I like a challenge. I like things to be difficult. I like to fight for every word I type.

Even writing a blog about something is easy. I mean you go in there with a plan and whammo. You’re done. Again no challenge. Most of the time you don’t even have to come up with the something. Someone probably told you what that something was. “Hey, dipshit, write a blog about something. Something about penguins.” I mean really? Penguins? How hard would that be. BOOKS have been written about the little bastards. MOVIES have been made about the cute fuzzy balls of fishy squishiness. No. I definitely won’t be blogging about something.

Playthings are out too. I mean come on. Your playthings are private. What you do with your playthings probably would get your blog marked as MATURE and that would kill half your audience. Which also rules out private things. If you blog about them, they wont be private anymore. the whole world will know about them and then they’ll be public things. Can’t have that happening now can we?

So that only leaves one question. What thing should I blog about? I mean the possibilities are endless there too. I mean its RIDICULOUS how many things there are in the world and how important these things are to people. Take shiny things for example. You set a shiny thing in front of most people and the rest of the world disappears. Some people like deadly things. Cobras. Scorpions. Spiders. Me personally I don’t like deadly things. I like soft things, fun things, expensive things, and loud things. Things that I don’t like are mean things, sharp things, hot things, and nagging things.

But this is kind of scary. There has to be one thing I can blog about. But even blogging about one thing is kind of difficult, but not difficult enough. Blogging about one thing requires focus. Focus isn’t one of my strong suits. As a matter of fact if I had to tell you one thing about me, it’s that I have the attention span of a gnat. Oh, SHINY!

I guess the only thing I could POSSIBLY blog about is nothing. Crap. I just did.

 

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  1. August 27, 2011 at 7:12 am

    Sweetheart, I have just got in,sat in front of my puter, and almost chocked on my subway with laughter :-D. Perfect post, real live un-pretentious perfect wiring! (Hug)xx

  2. August 27, 2011 at 10:51 am

    I’m going to look into some help for you, Sean. đŸ˜‰ Hang in there, I’m sure I’ll find someone….

  3. Scott
    August 29, 2011 at 12:26 pm

    You could blog about how much you and Sam Morton look alike. (He told me that you were practically twins when I was talking to him at the Printers’ Row Book Fair in Chicago.) Thanks for the laughs!

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